April's Fool

Here is a short story I wrote recently in response to a prompt about finding something unexpected in your glove compartment when pulled over for speeding. It had to be less than 725 words, which was quite challenging, but ultimately made it pretty concise. Hope you enjoy!

April’s Fool

     If Sophie’s hair hadn’t turned orange, I would never have thought I’d have to marry her creepy brother.

      We were getting ready for the biggest party of the year, and her hair was downright polka-dotted a sickening shade of tangerine. I tried not to laugh. But when she looked up at me with sheer panic, I couldn’t contain myself.


      “April, you’d better stop! You’ve gotta’ help me!”

     That just made it worse.

     “Jake’s going to be at the party, and I look like a friggin’ hyena!”

     My sides hurt after awhile; the laughter just wouldn’t cease. Sophie slapped her keys into my hand, ordering me to get more hair dye.

     “Okay, I’m going,” I said, wiping tears from my eyes.

     “You’re the worst best friend I never had!” she called after me. “You’d better hurry or we’ll miss the whole thing!”

      I jumped into the old Civic that Sophie shared with her brother and raced to Walgreen’s. I grabbed a suitable shade of brown dye and did double-time back to the dorm. When I was about to turn into the lot, I noticed blue and red lights flashing behind me.

     Pulling over, I cursed the forces that were trying to prevent us from getting to the party. I fumbled around for my license, hoping Sophie kept the registration in the glove box. I rifled through a stack of papers, dumping them onto the seat. Thankfully, the registration was there and I thrust it at the officer. As he wrote my ticket, I gathered the papers, and that’s when I saw it.

     With shaking hands, I held up a picture of myself in a wedding dress, standing with Sophie’s weird brother in front of a priest, the bridesmaids’ flowers matching my bouquet of stargazer lilies. Fancy calligraphy in the corner read: Tom and April’s Wedding, March 5, 2011.

     But it was only January! How was this possible? And I would never in a million years even go on a date with Tom, much less marry him!

     My horoscope had said my love life would improve this week. I assumed that meant I’d finally connect with John, who was newly single and would be at the party tonight. I never imagined Tom was the one I was destined to be with.

     “Are you okay, Miss?” the officer asked as he handed me my ticket.

     My head swam with confusion and revulsion as my stomach did a back handspring into a full twisting layout. A faint ringing echoed in my ears. “I’m fine,” I managed, and after he took off, I sat there on the side of the road utterly stupefied, trying to imagine a life with Tom.

     He always looked at me like I was his next meal, even though he was usually shoving Twinkies in his mouth. He had an uncontrollable stutter. He walked with a shuffling gait. And those were his good qualities. He smelled like rancid eggs, had greenish teeth and his face blistered with whiteheads. His hair hung in greasy strands over his eyes. And the Megadeth t-shirt he always wore had holes in the armpits.

     He was smart though. He always studied, so he’d probably get a good job eventually. I couldn’t remember ever having a conversation with him, but perhaps he really was witty and charming. And with much help, he could become somewhat presentable. That was a huge stretch, but I guess anything’s possible. Maybe he really was the one for me and I had been blinded for too long. Perhaps he had whatever the other guys I dated were missing. Maybe he really was my Mr. Right!

     I tucked the picture into my purse and headed back to Sophie’s room. As I entered, I heard her yelling into the phone.

     “How should I know where it is?” she screamed, and after a pause, she said she’d look and hung up.

     “Tom is such an ass!” she said, grabbing for the hair dye.

     “Oh?”

      “He’s freaking because he can’t find some picture for his project.”

      “What project?” I asked, suddenly quite interested.

     “For his advanced Photoshop class. They’re supposed to create images of impossible situations. Said the one he’s looking for has you in it.”

     I hugged April then, spinning her around the room with her polka-dotted hair, the happiest I’d ever been.

     “What the hell?” she asked, pushing me away. “Has everyone gone crazy?”

     “Nah. It’s just a good day after all. Now, let’s get ready for that party.”